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SS : Heartbeats Part 3

November 9, 2013






“I’m home!”

“MUMMY!!!!!!!!”

Khushi smiled with joy as Libbi came bounding up towards her…

“Whoa!” she cried out as she staggered backwards…”You’re getting heavy! I can’t catch you like this anymore…”

“Get off your poor mother!” Raj called out from the next room…

Libbi kissed Khushi’s cheeks…”How was your first day mummy!? Was everyone nice?”

Khushi groaned as she lowered her little girl to the floor, “Yes, everyone was lovely…I met a lovely lady who is my superior, and yet we have become great friends…after just one day!”

“I told you dear,” an attractive older lady peered out from the kitchen…”You will make friends easily…because your heart is beautiful…”

Khushi’s face fell…”Thankyou Veena, I appreciate all your encouragement…”

Veena motioned to the loungeroom, “Libbi, Go and get your uncle, tell him that dinner is ready…”

Once Libbi had run away, Veena approached Khushi…”You still don’t believe you have a beautiful heart?”

Khushi tried to turn away but was only pulled back…”Khushi…I have told you for many years…ever since the day I found you fainted on my doorstep, that you are a beautiful person, with a beautiful heart…”

She shook her head, “I’m not…”

Veena frowned…”Don’t argue with me, you ARE!”

Khushi felt something inside her snap…”I’m not! Why else would he have left me?”

There was an eerie silence before Veena continued…”My sweet girl, You were treated unjustly! And it was NOT your fault! You can’t blame yourself for believing in someone! for trusting that someone would do the right thing…”

Roughly wiping her eyes, Khushi crossed her arms and tried to divert the conversation…”How was Libbi today? Are her studies going well?”

“Don’t try to sidestep the subject…I don’t understand, how, after all these years, can you still not trust me…”

“Not  tru-” her eyes brimmed with tears…”I trust you…so very much…you have been my strength, you and your son Raj…I couldn’t have asked God for a better second family…”

Veena wrapped her arms around her, “Khushi, I love you, as my own daughter, and I will always tell you how precious you are…no matter what that no good man made you believe!”

Khushi was now chuckling softly, “You have such a temper, just like my Buaji…”

Veena’s expression softened…”Have you thought any more about what we talked about the other night…?”

“No…no I…I don’t want to think about it…It’s been too long…”

“Time makes no difference when a loved one is involved…I know that they probably had moments when were mad at you for leaving, but they would never be angry enough to turn you away…I know…I know this in my heart…”

Khushi shook her head…”I don’t want my old life back…I have Libbi, I have you…I don’t need anymore…”

“But, don’t you ever wonder if he-“

“NO.” Khushi snapped out, louder than she should have…”I don’t care about him…I don’t…”
Veena stayed silent, but she could see the truth in Khushi’s eyes…

The love for her husband was still alive…

Even if the broken part of her heart was numb…


………………


“Bhai?”

Arnav lifted his gaze to Akash…

“Oh my, Arnavji, you have the reddest eyes! You have to stop work now…”

Payal and Anjali had accompanied Akash and Arnav to the new office reopening.

“I will soon Payal…”

Payal clicked her tongue, “No. NOW! When Di returned home yesterday I promised her that I would take care of you…”

Arnav sighed, “Did Di get home safely?”

“Yes, she arrived back later than expected though, I think there was heavy traffic…”

He nodded, his face expressionless…

“Bhai, we’re heading back home tonight, but…” Akash paused and looked over at Payal…

“But what?”

Payal continued for her husband, “Buaji called us…”

Arnav froze, but soon stood up from his chair, running his hand over his face…”She told you…?”

Payal nodded…”Are you alright?”

“Bhai?”

Arnav finally looked up, his red eyes now rimmed with emotion, “No…I’m not alright…I’ll never be alright again…”

Payal rushed forwards, pulling him into a hug…”Arnavji, she wouldn’t want you hurting like this! I know!”

He didn’t move, his sight was now completely blurred…

Akash walked towards them both and rested an encouraging hand on his brother’s shoulder…”Bhai, Payal is right, you need to stop beating yourself up like this…”

Arnav’s voice was rasping and harsh, “I deserve it…”

Payal was about to contradict him when he stepped back, his anger returning as he said…

“How long did she cry while she waited for me? For how long did she weep while I stayed away HOPING to hurt her?…TELL me that I don’t deserve it! I dare you!…”

Akash drew Payal backwards, “Bhai, we’re your family…we love you…”

Arnav sucked in a breath…”I’m sorry…I shouldn’t keep dragging you all down…”

“Payal, we should probably get going…”

“We can’t leave him like this…”

Arnav straightened, “I’m fine. You just caught me at a bad time…I’ve done this before…I’ll get this new office running smoothly, and I’ll be back soon enough…”

“But you’ll start something new, and be off again just as fast…”

Arnav seated himself back down, “I can’t be in one place too long…the memories just…just get too much to bear…”

“I understand, come Payal, we have to make a move now, or we’ll be home at 3am and Nani will think we’re burglars…”

Payal managed a small smile, but turned back to Arnav, “Call us if you feel like you can’t cope…we’re here for you…”

Arnav clenched his fists, trying to maintain control of his emotions…”I will…”



……………




“I can spell metamorphosis!”

Khushi’s eyes widened as she pinched her daughters cheeks…”You CAN?!”

Veena chuckled as Libbi stood up straight, and began to rattle off the word…

“Metamorphosis, M-e-t-a-m-o-r-p-h-o-s-i-s!”

They all clapped and Libbi crawled onto Khushi’s lap…

“Wow, that is incredible! You are really clever, you know…that word is a big one, and quite hard!”

Libbi grinned, “I know…I am Libbi Kumari Gupta…I never back away from a challenge!”

Khushi’s heart pounded…

A challenge…your father used to say the same thing to me…you are a lot like him…

“Come Libbi, you can help me clear the table and wash up tonight…”

Libbi scowled at Veena for a moment, but soon nodded and began to help…

Raj slid his chair closer to Khushi…”So, your first day? How was it?”

Khushi yawned, “It was good actually, I’ve made a great new friend, who is actually my boss…”

“You’re FRIENDS with the boss of the company?”

Her expression turned aghast, “No! no no no, MY boss is Anne Gomall, but HER boss is the new guy, I don’t know his name. I don’t have to, as I won’t be working with him…”

Raj rested his elbow on the table, “I heard some of the staff gossiping about this guy, he apparently starts up companies and then moves on to the next, never staying in the same place very long…He’s quite powerful, a real stickler…”

Khushi rolled her eyes, “That is a good thing that me leave fast then, he sounds like Arn-”

Raj frowned…”Like who?”

Quickly stopping herself from saying too much, Khushi continued, “He sounds like someone I used to know…someone who treated his staff abominably…”

“Ugh, he sounds horrible…”

Khushi felt her chest seize up…”He wasn’t always…”

Raj quirked a brow, “Who was this person? Someone you once worked for…?”

She said nothing, just nodded…

“Before you came to us?”

Khushi nodded again…

Raj took her hand in his, “Khushi, I love you so much…you’ve been the sister I never had…and I adore Libbi…”

“I love you too, and Veena…you both are all Libbi and I have…”

“Why won’t you tell me his name?”

His name.

The name of the man who broke her heart, the name of the father of her child, her husband…

Arnav Singh Raizada.

Khushi bit her lip…

Raj was now pretending to punch the air…”I would LOVE to find this idiot who let you go! Just once I wish I could give him a hard slap on the face!”

Her laughter at Raj’s attempt on ‘tough talk’ made her stomach ache…

“What! I’m serious!”

Khushi turned around to Raj and pulled him into a fierce hug, “I know you’re serious…and I love you for it…believe me, I haven’t had many people want to stand up for me…”





……………..





Arnav walked into his empty flat…

He barely noticed his surroundings, even though Akash had chosen a brightly colored modern apartment.

Colors no longer made his life bright…

Everything was dull…

Food was tasteless…

Laughter was forced…

Nothing mattered…

He walked robotically around the room and pulled off his tie as he slumped down onto the cream colored couch…

Closing his eyes, he willed for sleep to come…

God…I want her back…I NEED her back…

He KNEW that she only did what she thought was right.

But WHY do you not want to be found! I am trying not to be angry, but…damn it, why can’t I find you!

He knew that she felt as though everything was her fault…

It WASN’T your fault…If only I could find you…to tell you that…just one more look…just one more…I would do anything to have you back in my life…anything…Khushi Kumari Gupta SINGH RAIZADA…




……………………




In a darkened room, not 10 minutes away, Khushi lay in her bed, staring at the stars…

Libby was snoring softly next to her, cuddling onto a pillow…

Arnavji…

She clenched her teeth…

Arnavji…

“No…” she muttered…”I will not say his name…for the one-millionth time…NO!”

But her thoughts defied her…

She could feel his hard body inside hers, and his hot mouth on her skin…

Tears broke free from her eyes…

She had learned that she had no way to stop him from appearing in her dreams, flashes of him in her thoughts, filling her memories uninvited. 

Khushi inhaled, banishing an image of him, and concentrated on the stars.

You’d think a broken heart would stop bleeding.

If only forgetting were possible. 

If she could forget him by means of an elixir or tonic, she would have ordered a magical potion from sheer desperation, even if only for some placebo effect.

All she had right now, was the stars…

But even as she stared, the sparks spelled out his name…

The heavens were replaying the night they made love over and over…

“Arnavji…” she sighed, the heartbreak in her voice was plain and obvious…

Every night, Arnav took possession of her thoughts, making her body spiral with need for fulfillment. 

Khushi whimpered, slamming her eyes shut in frustration. 

She had to stop imagining him. 

Even after all this time, without seeing or talking to him for years, he was dangerous to her heart…

Is there any place that I can escape him? Is there a world of respite SOMEWHERE where I may have a moment of peace, a rest from remembering the darkest hour of my life?

She bit her lip and Arnav instantly appeared in her mind.

She shook her head…“Stop…go away…our love was never meant to be…”










15 Comments leave one →
  1. November 9, 2013 8:22 am

    When are they gonna meet, honey? Make it fast, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease. Loveed every bit of it. Besides Are we getting any update soon? ~A~

  2. November 9, 2013 10:18 am

    It’s hard to see both of them totally heartbroken without each other……which is why it wil be amazing to see what happen when they finally meet up again!!! Many thanks

  3. November 9, 2013 10:19 am

    Gosshhh the way you penned down their each emotions,helplessness,desperation,guilt and unending love all I can say is that your an awesomeeee writerYour words held soo much meaning and I'm jus soo glad that your writing this intense arshi love storyVeena n rahul are relli great person,sheltering two beautiful and fragile girls….dnt how exactly will arnav payback to themKhushi still crave for her husband after all she went through and arnav is jus as miserable..very well writtenLoved it to bitsssAmazinggg update!!!

  4. November 9, 2013 11:11 am

    Great update :)rohinid

  5. Lyssapie permalink
    November 9, 2013 12:25 pm

    Poor them both Are suffering so much. Both of them are blaming each other 😢
    I just can’t wait till their first meeting

  6. November 9, 2013 12:27 pm

    Khushi family is supporting Arnav cause they know how he is blaming himself and bitting himself each and everyday. there was just the moment where he get angry and think of now going back to Khushi but he did come but Khushi was broken and left everything……Oh i so wanted them to be face to face, as they are noe working in same office and she may see his remorse and the purnishment he is giving himselfloved the update

  7. pavi permalink
    November 9, 2013 2:16 pm

    Cannot wait for their first meeting.
    I want them both to end their pains.want to see how arnav meets with his daughter.
    You are going great.
    Libbi an unusual name
    Great

  8. lynnkaur94 permalink
    November 9, 2013 2:23 pm

    Oh my god they are both in so much pain 😦

  9. lynnkaur94 permalink
    November 9, 2013 2:24 pm

    Oh my god they are both in so much pain

  10. November 9, 2013 3:12 pm

    ohhh pleaseI want them to meetI can't anymore

  11. November 9, 2013 6:23 pm

    I was addicted to ur lovely stories but now its becoming torture bez of no updates and short update. I m srry this wll hurt a writer like u but wht joy normallt writers get from torturing or making us wait for updates.

  12. sessy01 permalink
    November 10, 2013 6:48 pm

    very emotional update,both are suffering equally
    u are a very talented writer to write such emotional update or a passion filled ones and this update is an another example for that.

  13. November 11, 2013 2:17 am

    Both are suffering…:'(
    Poor Arshi..

  14. November 11, 2013 1:52 pm

    Both, Arnav and Khushi are hurting from inside, broken ! Arnav's misery everyone in the family can see and know ! But Khushi, what about her ? Veena and Raj know she is hurting, but to what intensity, Khushi cant tell anybody ! Her plight, she cant even tell the name of Libbi's father, her husband is Arnav Singh Raizada !?!It was shocking when Khushi snapped and shouted at Veena, as she wasnt like that at all. Khushi didnt want to talk about Arnav nor did she ever want to hear about getting married again ! Khushi didnt want to go back to her family also as it would only remind her of Arnav. But all in vain coz Libbi looked alot like Arnav and had his attitude staring at her face all the time *nindy eyes sad*Both Arnav and Khushi suffered serious pain majorly at night when they were alone in their respective houses, alone and just one thing in common… They thought about each other a lot… Arnav cursing himself that he couldnt find Khushi and HE NEEDED HER, HE LOVED HER, THEY WERE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER ! Without her life had no meaning, everything was dull and blurred. BUT DONT YOU THINK HE DESERVED IT, HE BROUGHT IT UPON HIMSELF !!!!???!?!?!?On the other hand , Khushi used to think about the times they had shared, about the night they had become one in the true sense over and over again ! Sitting on her bed looking up seeing the stars in the sky made her feel like Arnav was just next to her. She could feel his hot breath fan across her, his husky sexy voice ! *tears in nindyz eyes* ! Khushi wanted to escape from all this and find a place which would give her peace of mind and Arnav wouldnt haunt her there ! Poor khushi, she cant even sleep, because the first thing she sees is Arnav Singh Raizada ! Poor Girl ….!!!So sweet..Akash and Payal trying to be his strength, but unsuccessful. It was so nice to read, for the FIRST TIME PAYAL HUGGED ARNAV, trying to calm him down.METAMOPHOSIS…see i can spell it. I can take up any challenge, Libbi said. This is what Arnav used to say… I'm ready to accept any challenge !….An advice… Khushi you dont know your boss's name ? Isnt that wiered, shouldnt you be knowing his name since you are working in his company ?!?! Knowing the name of your own boss, Mrs. Anne Gomall isnt enough !?!The remorse, pain, heartache, broken heart, repentance, guilt, emotions, undying and unending love is fully there explained in this chapter Sarah ! You really know how to pen down words and at the correct places ! Not too much nor less ! Just enough not over the top ! *nindy salutes*

  15. November 13, 2013 5:35 pm

    beautifully so sad both broken and missing each other very emotional update hope they meet soon amazing update your brilliant

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